Just a small warning, this post is mostly whining. You've been warned.

Today feels like it was a wash. My interpreter couldn't come to the appointment with the psychiatrist that I see about ADHD, and the backup one couldn't either, so it was just overall fucked up because I lose out on care. We could have done it with pen and paper, but the doctor said that he hadn't received the results of my bloodwork from my primary care doctor so there was no point in having the appointment. S called our primary care doctor, and they had sent the results in November, so someone is either lying or not doing their job. Either way, we're picking up the paperwork on Monday and then hand delivering them, so even though I'm on vacation from work, I'm still doing someone else's fucking job for them. I just want my ADHD meds, man. 🤷 Its not like I'm asking for mental stability, peace of mind, or the ability to be alone with my thoughts in absolute silence and not a neverending cacophony of mental sewage, or anything like that. Ya know?

I also kind of want to address the fact that even though this doctor frequently works with the Deaf and hard-of-hearing, he doesn't know any fucking sign language? Like none. What in the goddamned ever loving fuck kind of shit is that? 👎

Meeting with my psychologist after also wasn't really productive, either and I feel like I wasted half of my day and €25 in train fare. I've been feeling a lot dysphoric lately, and feel like there's nothing that I can do to address it and she shrugged it off saying that I can just make do with what I have. She's not wrong, but the nonchalance was very off-putting. There is also the fact that her office really cannot manage appointments very well. I'm often scheduled on days that they know I can't attend, and it brings me a lot of anxiety when I have to deal with changing the appointments. I'm just going to cancel our next appointment and find a new one after the move. 😿 I'll be sad to go, because she's Deaf, just like me and I liked having someone to talk to that I could absolutely relate to. I can't see her anyway, because then the train fare would be almost €40 and I really can't afford that. Thanks, NS, you fucking greedy clowns! 🤡

Just ugh.